French Macarons Part 1

Here are my final words (well, until I get a new batch of eggs...): 

Don't try making these. You're better off just buying them.

Or, if you're slightly compulsive and delusional anyway (like myself), then be prepared to suffer... and not do anything else for the next week or so. This macaron-making adventure is consuming my life and destroying my self-esteem. I can only say: I am obsessed. 

It all began with my chocolate challenge. I wanted to make chocolate macarons. Then, I thought, maybe I'll just start with the basics, the plain almond-sugar version. C'mon, let's be honest now. Haven't you ever looked at or bitten into one of these heavenly little delights and thought to yourself "Ooo, they are so pretty but why are they so expensive? I mean how hard could they be to make?" Ha. HA! Evil little bastards. 

I can hear the voices of numerous other ardent bakers who have long suffered my current fate before their glorious moment of victory: "Old egg whites! Use new egg whites! One tray! Two trays! Italian meringue! French meringue! Stiff peaks, soft peaks! Closed oven! Opened  oven! Slightly opened oven! Ribbons! Bands! Lava! High speed my friend! Low speed my friend! It has to be shiny! It can't be liquid! Don't overfold! It has to flow like lava from Mount Hapinapanui! Dry them before baking! Don't dry them - just stick them straight into the oven. They need to have feet...le pied - that's what makes a REAL macaron!  It's all about the macaronnage!" OMFG.

Yes, the macaronnage. The French know all about it... The beautiful and magical (kind of like a unicorn) yet strangely unattainable moment that can only be captured with the precise balance between mixing the almond meal into the meringue and creating the exact amount of air bubbles without leaving the mixture overly folded. (I just shot myself in the head with an imaginary bullet.) And those damn little 'pieds'. I've made about four batches now. (If you were wondering where I've disappeared to and why I haven't posted in so long, this is why.) My cousin thinks I'm insane because I keep yelling "Where are the feet? There's no feet!" while staring at my oven in despair. Even my mother is slightly concerned. ("How many more batches of these do we have to eat? What ARE you trying to make?") 

As with all obsessions, I have reached the point of no return. It is too late to give up. I will not stop. I will not rest until I bake them with feet. 

I need more eggs.

Roasted Duck a l'Orange

Once upon a time, there was a duck. It got frozen ... without one of its limbs. It was marinated over night and roasted in oven for an hour. While still juicy, crisp and golden brown, it was cut up to quarters and gobbled up by four ravenous humans. The humans were satisfied after dinner. The End.

Oh, and we must not forget the awesome orange sauce that I made...

Mmm...cake.

The last one I made disappeared in a couple of days. I was craving some today so I baked myself a mini 5" version. Instead of using buttermilk (which is really too fatty), I used vanilla yogurt - much healthier! It still tasted super moist and delicious. ;)

Bring On The Thunderbolts!

I bought four blocks of unsalted butter today. For some reason, butter seemed essential in prepping for the upcoming winter months. I know it's not even December yet but the chilly weather has subconsciously made me want to use my oven more often. Plus, I've recently realized the monotonous drone from my electric mixer is actually quite soothing.

I made some mocha chocolate shortbread - the dough shaped into lightning bolts - last week for the opening night of the new Harry Potter movie. Coffee and chocolate: another match made in heaven... More chocolate goodness to come!

West Coast: Day 15 - Sea Urchin

We visited Vancouver's Fisherman's Wharf today.
The smell of the salty sea and fresh seafood was quite refreshing.
I guess that's the advantage of living so close to the ocean -  fresh seafood all the time...and so cheap.

My aunt bought a live sea urchin for three dollars and forty cents. I've have never seen the inside of one and trust me, it's not a pretty sight. The porcupine-like shell can be cracked open with a pair of scissors and gloves. You only eat the roe which is yellow ochre in colour.  My aunt said the ones off of the West Australian coast tasted better. I had a tiny bite of this one to compare to the one I tasted a couple years back at a Japanese restaurant. This one resembled the taste of lobster tomalley but raw. I'm personally not a big fan but it's a popular delicacy eaten as sashimi. But boy, it's one ugly little creature.

West Coast: Day 6 (posted a day after...)

It was meat, meat and more meat last night at Bubba's (Jackson, Wyoming). The pulled pork was delicious, juicy and fatty fatty fat. We also had beef brisket and spare ribs. My jeans are slowly starting to feel tighter. It's no wonder that there are so many overweight people in the States.

West Coast: Day 5

Tonight we are spending the night in Cody, Wyoming - a small town an hour away from Yellowstone National Park, which we will be visiting tomorrow! We had dinner at the Irma Cody Hotel (built by Buffalo Bill for his daughter Irma, hence the name). The food was alright but we had some red wine so I think that changed our opinion of the food. Oh, me and my alcohol.

West Coast: Day 3

Yesterday was a boring day in terms of food (lots of disgusting fast food). Today wasn't much better but I did make myself a pretty tasty English egg muffin sandwich this morning with sausage, home fries and a spicy salsa sauce. But we did see an incredible amount of pumpkins everywhere. Something about the midwest; they love their squash/gourd-like/pumpkins species out here. We visited a Gertens today (kind of the Wal-Mart equivalent for gardens/nurseries.) I have never seen a) so many pumpkins together in one place and b) so many different types of pumpkins. I love, love, love pumpkins. Weird, I know. We entered the prairies tonight (Murdo, South Dakota), literally in the middle of nowhere. Everything is flat and even the occasional tree seem out of place. Our Days Inn is cladded in wood logs and the lobby is filled with taxidermy. Perfect setting for a slasher film - House of Wax 2: Prairie Fire.

West Coast: Day 1

We left at 8am sharp this morning from Toronto and crossed the border (took two long dreadful hours - ugh US customs) at Sarnia, drove through Michigan State and now we are resting in Portage, Indiana for the night. My butt is in pain. The van is already in a state of despair. Doris (our GPS - not sure of the origin of her name...) hates us cuz we keep disobeying her orders to take pee breaks every hour on the hour, well, almost, and we insisted on the detour to the Coach factory outlet where the ladies of our travel party spent a lot of time and money. As for food it was breakfast at home, Mickie Dees for lunch (mmmmm - double cheeseburger!) and Longhorn Steakhouse for dinner. I had stuffed chicken with grilled portabello mushroom plus a glass of Samuel Adams. The other plate was my dad's grilled porkchops; I took a pic of it cuz it looked more appetizing half-eaten than mine half-eaten. We were so ravenous that I didn't remember to the photos until halfway through dinner. Then, we passed by a little family market to pick up some fresh fruits. The pumpkins reminded me how much I love Hallowe'en...and pumpkin pie. I mean, we all have one special memory or another related to pumpkins, right?

Braised Ox Tongue

I'm back in Toronto living with my parents and my cousin. Cleaning the house, buying groceries, occasionally picking up my cousin from school, running on the elliptical, cooking meals for four people everyday - my past month has been dedicated to this routine.

In a week or so, my parents, my aunt & uncle and myself are embarking on a three-week trip to the Canadian (and American) west coast. My new challenge? To record as much food related activity as I possible can. 'Challenge' is definitely the right word to describe the above mentioned task for myself. Um...March 27th was my last real food post. That's almost six months ago - oops. (Boink on the head - I'm a terrible blogger.)

Last night was an adventure. Ox tongue. Bought from a Chinese supermarket, the black rough outer membrane was already removed, completely destroying my hope of doing my own mini-surgery. The stewing took about two and a half hours. The smell of herbs, spices (star anise, Sichuan peppers & peppercorns), an onion and a piece of cow muscle rocking out a stew in my slow cooker (the same cooker my very own mother used a couple months ago to make me loads of strange-tasting Chinese herbal medicine) and a can of beer lingered in the house for hours. Then I braised it for another two hours with carrots, tomatoes, mushrooms, garlic, more onions and some red wine. Half a bottle to be exact. What can I say, I love alcohol. The meat was really tender, almost like corned beef, but fatter; it'd make excellent sandwich meat.

Herbs and Garden

Life has been full of surprises for the past 2-1/2 months. Unplanned events had put a halt to my blog posts but those are far and well behind now. Soon, I should be up and cooking, burning down kitchens and setting smoke detectors off once again.

This afternoon, I took a peek out onto the veranda from my bedroom window. I saw that my herb plants are all grown up. They were babies just two weeks ago when I bought them at the local superstore. I went outside and did some trimming. My borage plant seems to be doing the best - it's almost two feet tall now! It's blossoming beautiful violet and pink flowers. I'm definitely going to make ice cubes with the flowers when cocktail season kicks in. Borage is supposed to have a cucumber-like taste so I'm also thinking of making a crisp, fresh salad with cucumbers, tomatoes and red onions.

My herb pots also include sage, rosemary, thyme, Italian parsley, basil and Greek oregano. They have been attracting a lot of various bugs. My dill plant was bought in a separate pot. Sadly, it's going through a rough patch. As you can see, most of it is yellowing. There is the one little fighter in the middle that I'm hoping will pull through.

The landlord planted some gorgeous yellow flowers in the front yard that are in full bloom at the moment. I'm not sure what they are called. They are calming to look at in any case.

Gnocchi!

I have already made these twice in three days! Containing so few ingredients (2 pounds russet potatoes, 1/3 to 1/2 cup flour, 1 egg and Parmesan cheese as desired - even the last two are optional), these little potato balls are very satisfying as comfort food. They are, however, tricky to make right and definitely require lots of practice to be able to make them like a true Italian. 

Heads up: Do not freeze!!! They can be kept in the fridge up to a week or so but freezing them was the worst idea ever. The texture changed and the gnocchi fell apart when boiled in water and tasted like gooey gunk afterwards. Trust me on this one. Eating nasty mushy gnocchi that you'd spent hours making will make you feel minuscule. Moreover, it will destroy a part of any confidence that you may normally have in the kitchen.

It seems that the most important thing is achieving the right potatoes-flour ratio which depends entirely on the absorbency of the potatoes you buy. 

Serving them with a cream sauce (shown below) or a simple tomato sauce does the trick. 

Phyllo Log with Caramelized Apples

Probably the best advice that I can give is to not choose the wrong phyllo dough recipe. That sounds unbelievably simple (and yes, I'll admit it, slightly anti-climatic) but it's the dead honest truth.

Phyllo dough is not difficult to make. There must be some conspiracy out there trying to embed the concept into women's minds that making homemade phyllo dough may be the most strenuously terrifying experience (aside from childbirth I'm speculating) that they could possibly put themselves through. Yet women will have no hesitation spending hours and numerous you-had-better-spent-them-on-a-treadmill calories making three-tier chocolate cakes and 15-pound turkeys. Even lasagne takes more time and effort to make.

The second and almost-just-as-important advice is: When you think it's thin enough, it could probably be thinner. Yeah you will never be able to roll out the dough to factory-machinery thinness but you can sure try. And it will be worth it.

The third advice, work fast and with smaller chunks of dough. You don't want to phyllo to start drying up. Smaller chunks will allow you to push out the dough thinner without running out of room on your board.

Conclusion? Do not pick a recipe that calls for butter or lard-related substances in the dough. It's ok if you brush it on after, that's what you're supposed to do. No eggs either. Neither made a huge difference in the end result tastewise or texture wise and if it's not needed, why add the extra fat? Also, don't forget, keep rolling and be quick!

Oh a word of caution, not advice, just words from a klutzy me. Don't be an idiot and think that your (little) flour well/mountain/hole that you'd made can hold in ALL the liquid that you're about to pour into the centre. Chances are, the liquid will bulldoze its way through the flour and spill all over your kitchen countertop. Use a bowl or add the liquid a little bit at a time.

I will be trying a new recipe which only calls for flour, vinegar, olive oil, lemon juice and hot, hot water. Much healthier.

Stick it to...

Why do I do these things to myself? If you read my new upcoming challenge, you'd probably think the same thing. Yes, I'm planning on making my own phyllo dough and sheets. Just typing about the challenge makes me palpitate. Why can't I be like any other normal person and pick up a pack of premade frozen ones from the closest supermarket? Why do I find kneading and rolling and re-kneading and re-rolling out pastry until they are tissue paper thin actually exciting?

I just don't trust it. "It" being "The Man".
What does he put in my phyllo dough? I don't know. 
Can I ever trust "The Man" to look out for me? Most likely not. 
Why does "The Man" deceive me to believing that a cute, squeaky white dough boy with a fake bellybutton is in charge of overseeing the production of my premade baking products or that frozen dinners are actually made with my lifestyle in their mind? To rob me of my money and health.
This is the same reason why I make my own pie crust and almost everything from scratch if I possibly can (within the limits of my present kitchen - ie: my mother). "The Man" is out there. Fellow health-lovers, agree with me, we must not give in...

So begins my new challenge.

Le Fromage Bleu

Zak left some blue cheese in my fridge last night and then fled to Cambridge. Now what? I am not a big fan of the smelly cheese but I cannot possibly throw it out - I will never hear the end of it - "How could you? Blue Cheese is my favourite!!!" Ok, everyone, settle down. The most obvious solution: look up a recipe that I can discreetly sneak the blue cheese into yet somehow still practice working on the pastry dough challenge.


So as I greedily stuffed myself with leftovers scavenged from the refrigerator (a slice of spinach & cheese quiche with a side of beef stew in red tomato sauce),

I began blogging and searching for the ultimate blue cheese recipe. Then I found this: Almond Blue Cheese Fritters. Blue cheese, check. Pastry dough, check. Almonds, check. It's going to be deep-fried and crispy, check and check. The cheese, although, isn't exactly discreet. Oh well, you can't have everything in life.


This is a no-roll pie crust recipe that I found from Joy the Baker's blog. It does not use shortening, just good ol' unsalted butter, vegetable oil and one tablespoon of light cream cheese. I also used olive oil instead of vegetable oil. It turned out super flaky and tasted quite buttery. The only down side is that this crust can't be rolled out so I could not use it for a top crust, only bottom. 

I added some extra ingredients to the chopped almonds and blue cheese: chopped cashews, haw flakes, ground cinnamon and a splash of heavy cream. Basically everything I could find in the house that might distract from the blue cheese.

Voila! The pastry dough turned out excellent but I just was not able to eat these fritters! The pungent taste of the blue cheese made me really nauseous. I only fried three and froze the rest. I'll definitely use the pastry again though!

Quick Update!

Here is what's been happening in my kitchen the past couple of days!


Friday night (really late - I was up until 2am)
I randomly had the urge to make a lemon meringue pie! Which I did and failed. I was so tired and couldn't admit it and totally forgot to bake the pie crust (I know right?!) before pouring the fillings in. So the pie (which was squared, because well, I still need to buy a new pie pan), looked beautiful but tasted nasty. Completely undercooked. UGH.

Saturday

Meg came over again for another cooking escapade. She made sugar cookies and I made my first successful batch of super-awesome-baked goods a.k.a. Blondieeees! Phew. I've made Blondies a gazillion times before but it's just never the way I want them. Finally...FINALLY I tell you. Since they were so good (would have been better if I had some ice-cream...May?) the entire batch of 9x9 square was gone before I even had a change to snap some pics. Not that I wasn't a possible culprit. Going to make another batch some time before the weekend!

Sunday
I bought a $300+ new toy yesterday: a KitchenAid Stand Mixer! I have yet to test it out but it does look very pretty sitting on my kitchen counter. Then, I attended the free cooking class at William-Sonoma which was really disappointing. It was more like a demo. We didn't even get to touch any food. I guess that's why it was free. The two ladies just kept trying to sell us the W-S products! When I got home, I made little lemon tarts for the office. I gotta work on the pastry tarts...not flaky enough.

Tonight
I just made a quick, comfort meal: home fries. We ate so much of this in Rome I could make it with my eyes closed. I added some spring onions and leftover bits of Chinese BBQ pork I found in the fridge. It tasted pretty good to me.